Happy New Year! And thus begins a new year, a decade ago I was a new mother. I can hardly believe it was so long ago yet, it seems like only yesterday my husband and I were making our way thru the maze of adoption.
Beginnings. Starting. Where do you even start. We started before the internet was a common thing. There were no web sites on adoption; no 'how to' or agencies on line. I started the old fashioned way. The yellow pages. I looked up, under adoption, all the agencies in NY. We decided that we would go thru an agencies right off because we did not have any idea what we were doing and we were not knowledgeable about lawyers and we did not have the money for a Private adoption.
We were under the impression that private adoption was 3 times the money. And they can be, but it is all depending on how you adopt, where you go and who you use. It is all overwhelming and a bit scary. There are so many things to learn, consider and comprehend. It's a mystery how a system that has so many hoops to jump thru and rules one must follow is allowed to have so many avenues to explore and yet there is not one standard . Everything varies: from state to state or country to country . Very overwhelming and quite confusing. Which is why we found an agency. We loved, protected and taken care of and in turn they found us the best lawyers in the world.
You can go thru only a lawyer; advertise on your own and pay according to the state in which you live or the state of the birth mother lives. OR you can go thru an agency . All agencies are different with different rules, regulations and philosophies. No matter how you go, a lawyer is a must. You need a lawyer to file the paperwork and to represent you in court. To be your voice, answer your questions and hold your hand thru the ups and downs of adoption ( If you go thru an agency they will be there for you and have more contact with the birth family). You need a lawyer that will also cry for joy when you receive you baby, that will stop you in the movie theater and give you a hug 7 years later and lawyers that still look forward to your Christmas cards and impromptu visits. You need Runbold and Siedelman @ adoptionlawny.com.
By Kim Bjorge, Photographer, Potter, Wildlife Rehabilitator and Croton Mom
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